[ He'll praise him for seeking help again when things are figured out. He doesn't want to push the little one. And last session he may of stepped on toes so he is just glad that he's still trusted. ]
[Donnie's not sure he'd say he'd figured things out. He just didn't know who else to bring it up with. Would his brothers understand? A neutral party seems the best option.]
If that is what you like. You can come see me in a few hours. I just need to clean up my office, my miniatures are just finishing drying their new layer of paint.
[ When ever Donnie arrives, there's a small set of candy just an foot bigger then what should be best... And a set of candy floss. Both edible for organics and a large tub that seems to be... more suited for giants of a robotic brand]
[Mikey would be all over this. Donnie's a little more picky about things, but he does eye the selection critically just as he'd done the first time, not fully convinced that this isn't some kind of bribe.]
[Donnie pulls his knees in against his chest so he can hug them. At least he doesn't feel hyper-sensitive to everything anymore. The days after the swap had been reversed were a nightmare.]
It was amazing. Everything was so much clearer, cleaner- faster. That's just thought processes. I guess I can't deny how inefficient you guys see us as when it comes to structural capabilities either.
[ Rung slowly nods. Species Dysphoria seems to be possibility. He remembers Buster has told him something similar while he still existed on the ship. But certainly a different scenario. Buster could return to his transtractor at any time...
Donnie was body swapped. ]
It can be quite an euphoric feeling to find yourself compatible with a form you're not originating in.
I can't say I've never had my own thoughts of what it would be like to be different than how I came about.
[ Rung never really falters his smile. Though he's trying to be careful. ]
I-I thought it was cool. Freeing, even. For once I didn't have to feel like... Well, to feel, the way things do when I'm...this. Sometimes emotions feel like they're hardwired to other processes- and it just has this domino-effect on things inside, like... It feels like things just twist and knot up and it's uncomfortable sometimes, and a lot of the time it's really hard to identify. Sometimes I just wish I didn't have to deal with them.
...a lot of the time, really.
And it's not like I couldn't feel things when I was a giant robot but...it was like... I don't know, different. The gut-feelings weren't there. Maybe because you don't have those particular organs that somehow just get affected when you react to something in some way or another. It was easier to detach myself from things. I didn't feel bad about stuff. But...I didn't realize when I was possibly hurting other people.
Much like an organic child, a young Cybertronian must learn to navigate things. You have your organic life and maturity to thank for understanding limits.
And as a Cybertronian. Well, I can imagine the easier compartmentalizing was wonderful when you live overwhelmed with yourself.
Being cybertronian is wonderful, we tend to find ourselves healing so much faster then others. Thinking faster... but we also think so fast you miss the little things.
Like yes. Not realizing your own strengths, cruelty, the capacity for infinite harm.
And yet, I wonder. Could it be you could detach easier because you were Cybertronian... and thus thought yourself in more capable form..
Or was it you found yourself in so much bliss it was easier to ignore the rest of the world and focus on the moment.
Specie Dysphoria is not uncommon... its not well studied. But... it is possible. If its something you would like to look further into.
[The turtle shifts uncomfortably as Rung speaks, pressing his face into his sleeves like he could hide in them.]
I never-
[He squeezes his eyes shut.]
...it's not that I don't like who and what I am. But sometimes it just seems like there's so much to have to deal with and... I don't know what to do with myself.
But it was nice. For a while. Not having to deal with it. Not having to feel it. To be someone else.
There is no shame in either direction, Donnie. To want to be who you are now, to want to be something else. There is also no shame in not knowing which.
Perhaps... it can still help. We can find the bridge of machine and flesh... find ways to help you learn how we manage our thoughts, lend it to you. In a way you can handle.
Is that possible? Short of becoming, I don't know, a cyborg.
[He can't help but glance at a hand then. Princer had already said he was something like a magical cyborg of sorts. The stone hadn't spread since Iskwiyac, but...what would happen if it did? How much of Donnie would he still be?]
[Not that Donnie's necessarily against such treatments but he'd never considered such options for something like dealing with his feelings. They'd never been that much of a problem before, had they?
But then he's never had a bomb-crazy girlfriend before either]
I'd...like that.
[He's not sure where he would even start otherwise, short of making himself a Cybertronian frame.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
momijizukamori
no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 08:21 pm (UTC)I have spots open.
[ He'll praise him for seeking help again when things are figured out. He doesn't want to push the little one. And last session he may of stepped on toes so he is just glad that he's still trusted. ]
no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 08:32 pm (UTC)Oh. Cool.
At your earliest convenience?
no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 08:49 pm (UTC)would [time] work best?
no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 08:51 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 09:08 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 09:32 pm (UTC)Hey...doc.
no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 09:40 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 09:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 09:46 pm (UTC)Ive been... reading on Earth foods the young of the planet enjoy. I heard it helps sometimes with trying topics.
So its there if you need the pick up. But we can start when ever you are ready.
no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 09:51 pm (UTC)Well I don't know about ready but...
[He inhales a deep breath, letting it out in almost a huff.]
Did...you get caught up in that body swap nonsense?
no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 09:58 pm (UTC)Who did you swap with.
no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 10:00 pm (UTC)Shockwave. -the cool one with the one eye.
no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 10:02 pm (UTC)I see. Would you like to tell me what that was like for you.
no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 10:12 pm (UTC)[Donnie pulls his knees in against his chest so he can hug them. At least he doesn't feel hyper-sensitive to everything anymore. The days after the swap had been reversed were a nightmare.]
It was amazing. Everything was so much clearer, cleaner- faster. That's just thought processes. I guess I can't deny how inefficient you guys see us as when it comes to structural capabilities either.
no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 10:20 pm (UTC)Donnie was body swapped. ]
It can be quite an euphoric feeling to find yourself compatible with a form you're not originating in.
I can't say I've never had my own thoughts of what it would be like to be different than how I came about.
[ Rung never really falters his smile. Though he's trying to be careful. ]
There are perks and cons to any species.
no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 10:38 pm (UTC)[He rests his chin on his knees.]
I-I thought it was cool. Freeing, even. For once I didn't have to feel like... Well, to feel, the way things do when I'm...this. Sometimes emotions feel like they're hardwired to other processes- and it just has this domino-effect on things inside, like... It feels like things just twist and knot up and it's uncomfortable sometimes, and a lot of the time it's really hard to identify. Sometimes I just wish I didn't have to deal with them.
...a lot of the time, really.
And it's not like I couldn't feel things when I was a giant robot but...it was like... I don't know, different. The gut-feelings weren't there. Maybe because you don't have those particular organs that somehow just get affected when you react to something in some way or another. It was easier to detach myself from things. I didn't feel bad about stuff. But...I didn't realize when I was possibly hurting other people.
no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 10:47 pm (UTC)And as a Cybertronian. Well, I can imagine the easier compartmentalizing was wonderful when you live overwhelmed with yourself.
Being cybertronian is wonderful, we tend to find ourselves healing so much faster then others. Thinking faster... but we also think so fast you miss the little things.
Like yes. Not realizing your own strengths, cruelty, the capacity for infinite harm.
And yet, I wonder. Could it be you could detach easier because you were Cybertronian... and thus thought yourself in more capable form..
Or was it you found yourself in so much bliss it was easier to ignore the rest of the world and focus on the moment.
Specie Dysphoria is not uncommon... its not well studied. But... it is possible. If its something you would like to look further into.
no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 10:56 pm (UTC)I never-
[He squeezes his eyes shut.]
...it's not that I don't like who and what I am. But sometimes it just seems like there's so much to have to deal with and... I don't know what to do with myself.
But it was nice. For a while. Not having to deal with it. Not having to feel it. To be someone else.
no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 11:03 pm (UTC)Perhaps... it can still help. We can find the bridge of machine and flesh... find ways to help you learn how we manage our thoughts, lend it to you. In a way you can handle.
no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 11:10 pm (UTC)Is that possible? Short of becoming, I don't know, a cyborg.
[He can't help but glance at a hand then. Princer had already said he was something like a magical cyborg of sorts. The stone hadn't spread since Iskwiyac, but...what would happen if it did? How much of Donnie would he still be?]
no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 11:14 pm (UTC)Help you compartmentalize your feelings, help you hone your emotions just enough that they stop being too much and become what is needed.
no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 11:22 pm (UTC)But then he's never had a bomb-crazy girlfriend before either]I'd...like that.
[He's not sure where he would even start otherwise, short of making himself a Cybertronian frame.
....]
no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 11:28 pm (UTC)You've walked as one of us already. Now we must find the key similarities then fill in the gaps.
And if you ever feel like its too much too fast, we can slow or even stop. This is your therapy. Your mind. I'm only here to help you thrive with it.
no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 11:31 pm (UTC)Okay.